Crypt Custodian Review
Cats are meant to have nine lives, but it looks like no-one told a mischievous black tabby named Pluto that. Eviscerated by a careless driver on a rainy night, poor one-life Pluto finds himself stuck in the afterlife. Where, after a comical misunderstanding over a few broken statues, he is commanded to clean cat ‘purr’gatory – cat puns, this review’s got ‘em – for all eternity. Still, it’s not all bad, as this neat storyline set-up sends Pluto on a charming video game adventure, one that is a delight from beginning to end.
Played from a top-down perspective, Crypt Custodian mixes an old-school Zelda aesthetic and accompanying sword-slashing gameplay with the labyrinthian structure of a modern-day metroidvania. Pluto searches the afterlife, makes cute friends, solves ingeniously devious puzzles, discovers satisfyingly secret paths, and bashes a fair few brutal bosses for good measure. The narrative accompanying Pluto’s adventures is easy going and genuinely humorous. Indeed, if someone was trying to cram in cat puns, they might even refer to the dialogue as being, ‘hiss’terical. Sorry, I’m just kitten around.
Visually, Crypt Custodian is simple, but simply oozes charm. With just a few frames of animation, Pluto has more charisma than numerous AAA protagonists. The world he explores is equally as engaging; fish can be seen swimming in deep-blue water, haze glimmers across moonlit swamps, and caves glisten with unearthly light. The fact that the whole game was put together by just one guy is frankly mind-blowing, Kyle Thompson must get up very early in the morning to make games this good.
Looking at Crypt Custodian it would be tempting to think that the whimsical visuals and light-weight storytelling would lead to flaccid combat, but that couldn’t be further from the truth. Pluto is a dab paw with a broom, so much so that he’d make a Samurai Pizza Cat green with envy. Thwacking a foe will have you feline good. Each strike is cathartic in its impact, with a genuine sense of collision as the unwitting baddie is sent flying. Meanwhile, Pluto can dodge and dash with the agility of a, well, cat. In short, the combat is fast, thrilling and responsive, particularly as the screen fills up with foes to take out.
This is a challenging game, no doubt. And with no easy mode, not necessarily an accessible one either. But, if you like your games tricky, then thanks to some supremely smart design decisions, Crypt Custodian never lurches into frustration. Take the enemy attack indicators, which clearly demonstrate when a cute demon jar thingy is going to attack and where, all you need to do is react accordingly. Soon you’ll be analysing the risks of a room-full of baddies, assessing each upcoming attack to time your dodge, plan your route through the melee, and follow-up with a right good broom bash.
The same applies to the brilliant platforming, which might just be the best example of the jumping art that I’ve ever seen integrated into a top-down game. Leaping from a top-down perspective can be fraught with difficulty, as it’s often impossible for the player to tell if they are going to land safely or not. Kyle’s elegant solution to this conundrum really is the cat’s whiskers. A simple on-screen icon lurks around Pluto’s lower paws, if it’s white in colour you know you will land on solid ground, if it switches to red you know you’re going to plummet to your doom. Then, with a generous dose of mid-air control, the player can correct their landing with confidence. This balance of precision and control has allowed Kyle to really ratchet up the platforming intensity, creating some thrilling set-pieces that will push your skills to the limit, but never your patience.
Crypt Custodian is suitably vast in scale, with huge areas to explore and then re-explore with your new-found abilities. Yet the world is so cram-packed with creatures to meet and secrets to uncover that the enormous environment feel alive. Which is more than can be said for poor one-life Pluto. Yet, when the afterlife is this much fun, perhaps having nine-lives is overrated?